


Birds of Prey (And That Time Huntress Drank a Vial of Magical Confidence)

by powertrip1000



Category: Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) (2020)
Genre: F/F, Light-Hearted, Sex Magic, Some Humor, service top helena
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:01:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23705806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/powertrip1000/pseuds/powertrip1000
Summary: Dinah propositions Helena who is one thirsty bitch. Thirsty Helena sips the wrong Coke.
Relationships: Helena Bertinelli/Dinah Lance
Comments: 18
Kudos: 168





	Birds of Prey (And That Time Huntress Drank a Vial of Magical Confidence)

**Author's Note:**

> Light-hearted humour attempt and some hot smut while the final chapter of 'not part of the plan' is being finished.

Dinah loved karaoke night at Patty’s, the nicest dive bar-slash-nightclub on Fridays. Karaoke before ten on Saturdays. The right amount of College asshats and corporate leeches. 

There was nothing quite like ending an evening of kickass kicking and sucker-punching and then heading to karaoke night to belt out her Destiny's Child jam ‘I’m a Survivor’ with too many shots in her system. 

Many eyes were on her as she showed off some sickening vocals but she felt that one pair of eyes, dark and wanting but never daring to touch. Ogling her tight pants when they dressed up before going to kick ass. Watching her stretch on the training mats. 

It was aboslute no surprse when she found Helena Bertinelli, owner of the eyes, in the crowd, sipping her stupid Diet Coke and just fucking eyes-glued to Dinah.

Her gaze was so focused it burned. Dinah felt suddenly enlightened to showboat some of her best moves of ‘little hip’ to the right, then the lift. Booty shake that chorus. 

Dinah finished her song to thunderous applause from her mesmerized, drunken audience and took a bow. She passed the microphone to the poor sap that had to try and sing after her. 

Maybe it was the drinking or feeling like a rockstar, but she still felt those eyes and swayed her hips all the way to where Helena Bertinelli and her stupid Diet Coke were. 

Helena took a gulp of air when she seemed to realize Dinah was in front of her, her straw very far from her lips. 

“Hey nice song,” Helena stuttered, eyes now looking anywhere but at Dinah. 

“You know, you are not subtle at all,” Dinah cautioned her, reaching out to fix a wayward hair on Helena’s head and gently push it in place. “Eyes on me all the time except when I talk to you you can’t look me in the eye?”

“Wh-what do you mean?” Helena awkwardly touched her hair where Dinah had just fixed it, a hesitant confusion on her face, this time peering up to make eye contact, “We have eye contact!”

Dinah rolled her eyes, feeling particularly impatient today. “You mean when I signalled you which guy I'm going to hit with my bat and you signalled me ‘okay’?”

“Exactly!” Helena’s discomfort usually showed with a side of boiling anger, but Dinah could recognize the flustered embarrassment at being called out for what it was. 

“I mean, Crossbow, let’s stop playing dumb...” She took the glass of stupid Diet Coke from Helena’s hand and slammed it down on the bar table nearby them before pressing her finger against Helena’s chest and poking her. “What about how you stare at my ass all the time, how when I’m talking like right now you watch my lips, and how when I get close to you, you avert your eyes like you’re guilty for thinking about how badly you want to grab my boobs or something.”

Helena’s eyes had dropped to Dinah’s lips, boobs, and then away as she went through the ogling routine, before Helena angrily crossed her arms to shout, “I do none of those things!” 

“You just fucking did it right now!”

Helena looked very cornered with the truth, and Dinah rolled her eyes before gesturing to the bartender and asking for a shot of rum. 

“Dinah I’m sorry for staring,” Helena’s voice reached her ears, none of the anger there anymore. 

“You don’t have to be fucking sorry,” Dinah turned to face her with an eyebrow raised. “This is an official invitation is what I’m saying.” 

“I’m sorry what?” Helena's eyes got wide. “Invitation to what?” 

“You have my permission to touch… I think about it too, you know…” Dinah leaned up to whisper-shout over the music right into her ear, “and if you really call yourself Huntress you can come and get it tonight baby. Let me be your prey...” 

Dinah wickedly laughed at the gaped expression on Helena’s face, and left her with a flirty wink and nose bop before heading onto the dance floor. Karaoke night was over and the DJ was spinning. In the corner of her eye she saw Helena grab her stupid Diet Coke from the bar table and chug it desperately. 

“What did you say to our Huntress, she looks like you stuck an arrow up her ass.” Harley cackled, joining Dinah on the dance floor five minutes later. Harley had that knack for showing up at the club when they were there. She had helped them with their mission earlier that night, taking down some gun runners. Renee was out of town with the girlfriend until Sunday. 

Dinah danced with her friend (if one could call Harley a friend), “Maybe I am fed up of her ogling and her pining and just requested she do something about it.” 

“Feisty Canary! She is still standing there like a total doof,” Harley snickered, “oh I love this song!”

\--

Helena put the empty glass of coke down, finding it much sweeter than Diet should taste. She felt so exposed and naked in front of Dinah, and she was terrified about what to do about it. She was also really fucking shocked Dinah had confronted her about that. 

Did she really stare that much? And fuck, here she was staring again. 

Dinah had been pretty aggressive with the drinks and was now dancing up a storm… probably the best course of action would be to talk to her sober tomorrow and admit that yes, Helena had these very specific feelings where she thought about Dinah all the time. Thought about kissing her and-

“That’s my Coke you drank!” Some guy interrupted Helena from her thoughts. 

“What?” she asked, confused at his panic -- it was just a coke. 

“My Coke!” he raised the glass from her fingers and looked inside, “you drank all of it!” 

“Mine was Diet,” she realised her glass was still there with a straw and she had taken the wrong glass. 

“Oh fuck,” the guy was totally panicking, “oh shit. This is not good.”

“It’s just a Coke,” Helena retorted. Why was this guy so torn up about the drink?

“My girlfriend is meeting me here soon -- I was saving it,” he looked about ready to cry. 

Then Helena connected the dots, “wait did you fucking drug it! Were you going to drug rape someone you fucker!”

Her yell and subsequent grabbing of him by his collar caused people to back away and watch the confrontation unfold. 

“No I, I wasn’t I--”

Helena slammed him against the bartop and glared as he whimpered in fright and pain, “what was in that drink!” 

\--

“We should probably go help,” Harley noticed the commotion before Dinah, “She's making that guy cry. Gosh, she is so cool.”

Dinah, suddenly worried and guilty for poking the bear, ran to intervene and remove Helena’s hands from the guy’s throat. 

“Helena let him go!” She pried the fingers away, almost scolding. “I think he gets that you’re not interested.” 

“He tried to drug rape someone!” Helena defended her actions, “and I accidentally drank it.”

The guy took that moment to bolt from the scene and out through the club’s front doors. The spectators cheered him on, yells of ‘rapist’ and other derogatory terms echoing upon his escape. 

“Piece of shit,” Harley clucked her tongue, “no worries Huntress… I grabbed his wallet so we have an address of the drug rapist. We can go kill this ‘Brian’ guy tomorrow if you’d like? That would be so much fun.”

“How about no killing and we call it a night? That drug might be in your system Helena… Let us walk you home.”

“Fine,” Helena crossed her arms, pouting. 

“Boo,” Harley pouted even further. “You could have at least let me break his arm or something though.”

“We can go beat his ass tomorrow Harley,” Dinah promised. 

“Yay!”

\--

Helena felt totally fine after she was walked home by her friends and bid goodnight. She expected something to happen to her, to make her sleepy but nothing did. 

Confused, she simply slept it off. 

\--

Dinah was finishing off her cigarette when Helena pulled up on her motorcycle at their ‘Birds of Prey’ secret warehouse. She had been really worried about Helena all night, seeing her was a big relief. 

“You’re never late,” Dinah commented, following Helena inside the metal make-shift garage door where she rolled her bike in to leave it for the day of training. “I take it the drug effects wore off?” 

Helena took off her helmet and gave Dinah an unusually confident grin, “Had to grab my bike from where we left it last night near the club.”

“Are you feeling okay?” Dinah was surprised at Helena’s demeanour. After their interactions last night she had expected a lot of awkwardness and had even prepared her apology speech. 

Something like ‘sorry I called you out on staring at my hotness and told you to make a move.’ 

“Where’s Renee?” Helena put her helmet aside and then went to close the door of the warehouse behind them so they were alone inside. Her leather jacket was unzipped next, and she removed it before draping it over her bike’s handlebars. 

“She went away for the weekend with some chick named Kate,” Dinah raised an eyebrow, “remember?”

“So we’re alone?” Helena took off her leather gloves next, now in just her riding pants, riding boots, and a white tank top. Her eyes took a glance down along Dinah’s figure. 

Dinah felt heat on her neck, “yeah listen… about last--”

There were hands on her waist and Dinah paused as Helena moved in close. Hips pressed to her own hips and her back pressed against cool metal. 

“You were absolutely right,” Helena, lifted a hand to tuck Dinah’s hair behind her ear, “I stare. I stare at your body, your lips… your hair, your smile… I think about kissing you and having you and God, Dinah… you drive me crazy in your tight pants.”

No more words were said and Dinah melted into the kiss pressed against her lips.  
\--

Dinah was trying to keep up which had never happened in any tryst before. 

How had she ended up naked, on her back, on one of their fucking training mats, with her legs over Helena’s shoulders and Helena’s tongue just… God it was so…

It was probably the sluttiest thing she had ever done and she had once hooked up in a friggin hot tub. 

Helena’s tongue was relentless in delivering strong, deliberate strokes. She had always pegged Helena to be some kind of bumbling virgin she would be telling what to do, but Helena was so practiced and swift…

Dinah felt the delicious prelude to a powerful orgasm building up between her legs, but just before she could reach her grand finale -- Helena retreated her mouth. 

Helena raised herself onto her knees, wiping the back of her hand and looking down at Dinah’s naked body spread before her. Her eyes were hungry in their gaze and Dinah had never felt so desperate for someone’s touch in her life. 

“Why’d you stop?” Dinah leaned up on her elbows, eyes hooded in eager desire as she felt Helena’s eyes trail along her legs and over her abs. 

“I don’t want to rush this,” Helena bit her bottom lip and let out a moan of approval. “You are so perfect.” 

Helena reached down to lift up her tank top, revealing a lacy black bra and a whole lot of bruises from their latest fight two nights back. There was a thin silver chain with dark purple amethyst dangling off the end and Dinah watched it’s hypnotic sparkle as Helena guided Dinah’s legs around her waist, leaning down until the cool touch of the amethyst was upon skin. 

Their hips were shoved together and Dinah was getting Helena’s nice leather pants wet as ground into her. 

No one could blame her for begging, “please, Helena.” 

Next, Helena’s hands came down to gently play with Dinah’s nipples, cupping her breasts while the thumbs tickled her peaks in a caress that made her shiver. Those hips were still grinding into her and Dinah hooked her legs around them for more friction. 

Helena smirked at her writhing desperation and then leaned down to kiss her again. 

\--

Renee Montoya was a detective for a reason, her acute investigative skills had always proved on point or at least really fucking close to on point. 

It did not take a detective to put two and two together with the scattered clothes and the telltale sounds of thumping and moaning. 

Maybe it was because she had a very nasty fight with Kate after a very romantic weekend, but finding Helena and Dinah going at it in the corner of the warehouse against the fucking filing cabinet she had set up?”

Fuck no. 

“Fuck no!”

Dinah’s whimpering was cut short to make an undignified squeak, hands jutting out to push Helena back from her. 

“You fucking kinky bitches,” Renee crossed her arms and glared. Hard. “Do you have to fuck where I keep my cabinet?”

Helena let out a groan before removing her hands from Dinah’s legs where they had been around her waist and letting her down to the floor. 

Dinah was in Helena’s motorcycle jacket but otherwise wearing nothing, and Helena whom Renee expected to be way more embarrassed than looking that smug, was in only her pants and boots. 

“Thought you were away for the weekend,” Helena challenged her before reaching down to pick up a discarded black bra and put it on. 

Renee found the vibe she was giving to be very strange, this was the same Helena who worked out in tracksuits. Who blushed whenever Dinah bent over in her tight pants. Who blushed when Dinah sipped coffee. 

Dinah sheepishly hid behind Helena to cover up her nudity and was at least apologetic about it, “sorry Renee… thought you were with Kate today.”

Renee rolled her eyes, “So when I’m not here you guys fuck everywhere? You know I touch that everyday to update our mission files.”

Helena just raised a brow at her while Dinah tried to joke, “you can use a computer though, amiright?”

“How long have you two been fucking? I always notice Helena staring and, no offense, Bertinelli, but I never thought it was more than that to be honest.” 

Again, Renee is surprised when Helena seems calm and collected -- still annoyed at the interruption even -- with her arms on her hips in a power pose. Dinah at least groaned in embarrassment and hid her face against Helena’s back. 

Helena eventually said, “technically it’s my filing cabinet so…” 

Offended, Renee was also dumbfounded. In the entire year she had been working with Helena, the woman never brought up the fact that she had paid for their operations and everything inside. 

Something was different about her. 

\--

“That was fucking embarassing,” 

After leaving Renee at the warehouse and accepting a ride home, Dinah found herself wanting to invite Helena up to her room to finish what they never got to. 

“Can I come upstairs?” Helena asked as if reading her mind, “Montoya stopped us right before the good part…”

The look Helena gave her was full of filthy promises. The orgasm she had been edged with and denied in so many positions was desperate for release. 

“Yeah sure,” Dinah stuttered, feeling flustered as Helena smirked and pulled her by the hand. “Helena... we should probably talk.”

“Sure,” Helena said in return as they made their way up the stairs and to the door. Dinah felt some relief. She needed to know what Helena wanted from this -- was it just sex? They were coworkers and she had been 99% sure Helena had a major crush on her just yesterday…

If Dinah had any questions about why Helena wanted to drive her home and come upstairs, they were forgotten the second she felt her body thrown back against her apartment door and lips claiming her own in a fervent kiss. 

Helena was not being shy and she was not being reserved. 

Dinah kissed her back, surprised once again at Helena’s demeanour but one hundred percent pleased. 

“Let’s get inside?”

“Sure,” Helena mumbled against her lips, not stepping back but allowing Dinah to open the door and pull her inside. ‘We can talk after, yeah?”

“Yeah, after.” 

When they were inside, Helena kicked the door shut and pressed Dinah against her hallway wall, hands at hips and lips on her neck. 

“Mmmmm,” Dinah closed her eyes, but lifted Helena’s gaze to her own, hands cupping her cheeks. “What’s gotten into you?”

“I just want you so bad,” Helena confessed, her voice so rough and desperate, “I have wanted you for so long, ever since I saw you.”

Dinah kissed her back, that was all she needed to know for now. This was a year of tension built up between them. 

For all the shyness and uncertainty she had always seen Helena have around her, Dinah was still amazed to feel the sure work of her hands like back in the warehouse. They slid around her hips, down to her lower back, they massaged their way up her ass and squeezed in all the right spots before gliding up her back and around her ribs to cup her breasts… they caused Dinah to gasp and shiver and desperately grab at clothing to get Helena undressed. 

Dinah was about to request they go to her room so she could spread Helena’s thighs and give her the best orgasm of her life, but before she could request it -- Helena was already ripping Dinah’s denim vest open and buttons were flying all over the place. 

Dinah felt her body turned around with a twist, cheek and front pressed to the wall as Helena kissed the slope of her shoulders and up her neck. Her hands came around the front of her tight pants and swiftly undid the button, reaching in and ----

“Oh!” Dinah felt fingers inside, curving in and then thrusting until she was a hot mess of shivers and moans. 

“You’re so wet for me Dinah,” Helena panted in her ear, “I’m going to make you feel so good… I promise…”

Helena removed her fingers before Dinah could experience a release, unclasping her bra from behind like an expert and then turning her back around to remove it from her body and close lips around Dinah’s admittedly very hard nipples. 

Dinah moaned when she felt Helena kiss down her belly, getting on her knees to pull down the unbuttoned tight pants with her thong at the same time. A thong that was soaked. She was buck naked and Helena was still fully dressed and kneeling down before her… laying gentle kisses on her thigh and --

“Fuck!” Dinah groaned out, the back of her head hitting the wall as she felt her thighs clasp hard over Helena’s ears. Helena lifted her legs over her shoulders and Dinah was so, so, so very close before Helena withdrew and stood up again. 

This fucking tease was going to make her beg for it. Again. 

“Helena, please no more teasing… please let me cum...” she was exhausted and had never been so turned on in her damn life. This was torture. 

Helena stood up, chin wet. With a sexy smirk she used her thumb to wipe the corners of her mouth before savouring her with a groan. She leaned in to kiss Dinah with a deep, wet, promise, “I want you on your back, on your stomach, on my lap… I want you every which way I can have you and then I want you again.”

“Fuck,” Dinah’s voice croaked out very weakly before she was picked up bridal style and taken to her bed. 

\--

Dinah awoke in the morning more sore than she ever remembered in her entire life. She had practically every inch of her body covered in touches and kisses, hickies on her neck and chest, a particularly delicious bruise on her right ass cheek from a few well-timed slaps… She needed water to replenish her electrolytes and also damn well needed to have her turn with Helena’s body.

While she eventually got Huntress out of her clothes, the woman had been so relentless in her maneuvers Dinah was left a whimpering powerless mess until the most powerful orgasm was finally given to her. 

When she turned her body, she found Helena staring at her with a smirk on her face. 

“How many girlfriends have you had,” Dinah mumbled, “That was some crazy skill.”

Helena just blinked at her, “none.”

Dinah was surprised, “so you’re more of a one-night stand kind of gal? I guess that makes sense… being a former assassin and all.”

“I’ve never had a one-night stand.”

“It means someone you have sex with and then leave, Helena. Like a hookup.”

“I know,” Helena let out a strangled yawn, “and I’ve never had one.”

“Friends with benefits?”

“Is that what you want us to be?”

Dinah frowned, “no… I… don’t know what I want yet. What do you want?”

“To do everything we did last night as soon as possible again, maybe even have you on my motorcycle. But the shower first.” 

Dinah groaned at the thought, sitting up, “no Helena, I meant what is this?”

“I don’t understand the question...” Helena frowned at her, “sex?”

“Not that,” Dinah smacked her forehead, “jeez. I meant what is going on between us… is this just our sexual tension being released, or do you have feelings for me?”

“I do have feelings… strong sexual ones,” Helena snuck a hand up Dinah’s thigh biting her lip. “I’m not done with you yet.”

Dinah was affected by the hand on caressing her and the promise Helena had in her eyes. She had just been fucked six ways from Sunday, but something was starting to feel very wrong. 

“Helena,” she touched the hand, “maybe enough for tonight?”

“Mmm,” Helena smiled and leaned up to kiss her shoulder, “You got it babe. Let’s rest up.”

Dinah felt her heart kind of crack as Helena smiled and closed her eyes, seemingly unaware or unaffected. Within a few seconds, the Huntress was fast asleep -- not even cuddling. 

\--

“Want to go beat up our would-be rapist and then have some margaritas after?”

“Only because crime is slow this week,” Renee murmured, bored out of her fucking mind. “And what rapist is this?”

“The one who was going to drug rape a girl at Patty’s last night which we found out when Helena accidentally drank his Coke and strangled him a little. His name is Brian and I have his address and credit cards right here.” 

Dinah was on her second cigarette, stressed out watching Helena clean her crossbow with absolute focus and calm. As if they hadn’t hooked up. No affection, no smile… nothing. 

She was starting to get pissed. 

“Oh yeah!” Helena perked up, “let’s go beat him up.”

“Rapists,” Renee huffed, “let’s make him cry. We can go all Girl With the Dragon Tattoo on his ass.” 

“When you say things like that I just want to hug you,” Harley said to the ex-cop. 

“I’ll drive,” Dinah mumbled around her cigarette. 

“Why doesn’t Harley drive?” Helena stood up, a playful smirk on her face, “we can sit in the back?”

“I’m not getting in any car if you guys are going to make out in the backseat,” Renee rolled her eyes. 

“No one is making out in the backseat,” Dinah said, feeling a blush on her cheeks. 

Helena looked disappointed, “shame.” 

“Did you guys fuck?” Harley screeched, doing a literal jump with her arms before clapping. “You did! You totally fucked.”

“Oh my god let’s just fucking go,” Dinah was feeling more and more pissed off. 

Mostly at Helena for joking around about this like it was no big deal. It was huge fucking deal! 

She slammed the car door of her convertible and glared as she turned the keys in the ignition, ignoring Helena as she jumped into the back looking cute in her light purple hoodie. Stupid Helena and her good looks. 

Harley got distracted giving directions so Dinah just wound up looking at the license herself as she yammered away and reminisced about the time she set a rapist’s dick on fire. 

They pulled up to a nice looking brownstone and Harley bolted for the door with Renee dragging her feet behind her. Dinah was kind of in the mood for a much bigger fight so she could hit and kick things but rapists needed a good ass-kicking too. 

She was about to take a step forward but Helena stepped in front of her and blocked her, a confident grin on her face. 

“Hey,” Helena’s hands were suddenly on her ass, cupping her close. Lips in her ear. “How about tonight we continue? I’m thinking of a nice hot bath…”

Teeth on her ear. Teeth on her ear. 

“Ju-what,” Dinah pushed her back by her chest, “what’s going on with you?”

“I just want to fuck you babe,” Helena not-so-shyly squeezed her ass and groaned into her ear, “fuck you so good…”

“Okay we need to -- we --- we have a mission,” Dinah pulled the hands on her glutes off with a flustered stutter. 

She stormed up the stairs -- what the hell was Helena doing? Just last week at the grocery store she had been blushing when their hands touched the shopping cart at the same time. And now she was what, public display of ass-fection?

“After this mission you’re mine,” Helena was behind her, voice not at all loud. 

“When did you get so handsy?” Renee glared at Huntress, having heard her comment and seen her groping. “And creepy?”

Helena just shrugged, “jealous much?”

“Excuse me!” Renee turned around and stepped into Huntress’s personal space to appear threatening. 

Helena laughed, “come on Renee, I’m just playing around. And you don’t want to fight me…”

Dinah was shocked at the dangerous dare in Helena’s eyes and she stepped in between them. 

“Woah, woah, guys… come on. Focus. We have a rapist to beat up.”

Harley was aggressively knocking on the door and ringing the bell, unaware of the drama behind her. Then at last the door opened and the guy from the club screamed when he saw them. 

\--

Harley had already punched him in the stomach and shoved him inside to stop his scream short. 

“You know what I do with rapists, Brian?” She smiled wickedly, “I like to break their dicks and cut them off.” 

“I’m not a rapist!” he pleaded, arms up in surrender, “please, please!”

They all stepped forward and he started to sob in fear.. 

“Please don’t hurt me -- the lady said it would give me sexual confidence. The drink was for me, not for a girl!”

“Wait what?” Dinah grabbed Harley before the girl could kick the guy. “What was in that drink?”

“S-sexual confidence?” Brian squeaked, the tears slowing down. 

Dinah looked back and shared a knowing look with Renee. 

“Please,” Helena scoffed at him, “that sounds like a rapist trying to excuse drugging someone. Nice try.”

“No I swear -- you! You drank it! The witch who sold it to me told me I would get the ability to sexually pleasure my girlfriend!”

“Witch?” Harley frowned at him, “I have witch friends, or magic friends. Was it Zatanna?”

“Doesn’t she do magic shows in the Spring?” Renee asked, “that act where a tiger just appears out of nowhere.” 

“She’s legit.” Harley confirmed. 

“That vial cost me ten thousand dollars and YOU DRANK IT IN MY COKE!” Brian pointed at Helena again. 

“That explains everything,” Renee pointed her finger at Helena, “you and Canary! You being a total douche, your change in behaviour...”

“Oh!” Harley spun on her foot and pointed between Helena and Dinah with delighted realization, “so it wasn’t cocaine coke! It was actual soda coke. I was so confused.” 

Dinah was too shocked to say anything. Her jaw was hanging open and there was a twisty feeling in her gut that Helena had been behaving oddly and it all started to make perfect sense. The suave demeanor, the come-ons…

“WHAT THE FUCK!” She exclaimed in horror. 

“So it worked?” the guy asked desperately. 

“Are you telling me when I drank your Coke,” Helena was now scowling, “you had a vial of magic in it that gave me the confidence to have sex with Dinah?”

Helena found all eyes on her, Dinah’s the most wide in their shock of ‘what the fuck!’ 

“I think I’m going to throw up,” Dinah mumbled. 

“No,” Helena shook her head, “no way. Nu-uh. Nope. Hell fucking no.”

“I mean,” Harley gave her a sympathetic shrug, “it makes sense. You couldn’t even admit you wanted to have sex with her before. I was 99 percent sure you were a virgin, and the kind of virgin who’s never even held someone’s hand ya know.”

“More like the kind who thinks a kiss produces a baby,” Renee offered. 

“Yeah. Or a dance means you’re engaged,” Harley added. 

“You covered your eyes when Dinah reached in her bra to grab cash for our cab,” Renee again. 

“You always blush when she does that hair flip between kicks,” Harley taunted. 

“You couldn’t say vagina when we talked about periods,” Renee looked far too amused. 

“You drew your kill list in crayon,” Harley again. “Though I use crayon for mine too and I’m no virgin -- never mind that one.” 

“I am not a virgin!” Helena yelled in frustration. 

“Not anymore you mean,” Harley stuck her tongue. 

“Just kill me,” Dinah covered her face with her hands. 

“Look, I was not a virgin before I had really great sex with Dinah, okay. I have just never been in love before… It’s different.”

“Aw, she’s in love with you Dinah!” 

Now Dinah was just angry. 

“Love? You were drugged with some kind of magic, you don’t love me!”

“I do too love you!” Helena pointed an accusatory finger back. “Look, growing up the way I did the only sex I’ve ever had I paid for! It’s just sex! I was always afraid to do something with you because of how I feel! I can’t just have sex with you, I want to be with you!”

“I never pegged her as the type to pay for sex,” Harley watched their back-and forth, “I feel like she just needs to walk into a gay club and the offers would come.” 

“Oh and you never thought to ask me if I wanted to be with you or just fuck you? You could have asked me, Helena!” 

“Of course I wanted to be with you and fuck you! It was fucking obvious!”

“Fuck you! All you were obvious at was ogling!”

“What the fuck! I asked you if you wanted to ride on my motorcycle, okay? I have never let ANYONE ride on my motorcycle!”

“Oh, and I’m a fucking mindreader? I think asking me out to dinner would have been better!”

“You could have asked me out to dinner first!”

“I need a fucking drink,” Renee crossed her arms, watching Helena and Dinah yell at each other. 

“I’ll never be competent in bed, will I? My girlfriend is going to leave me,” Brian’s eyes started watering. “And my savings are gone too.”

“You know Brian,” Harley placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, “you seem to suffer from low self-esteem, which in turn triggers performance anxiety making you more anxious when you think about pleasuring your girlfriend in turn causing a spiral of deterioration to your ego and ability to get an erection. This is entirely self-perpetuating. Instead of magic you could use therapy or viagra. Maybe even just talking to your girlfriend like these two idiots should have talked to one another.” 

“-- I fucking love you okay!”

“Well fine then!” Dinah was right in Helena's face, “I love you too!” 

\--

“Hey Harley,” Zatanna greeted her at her magic shop, eyeing the three women behind with her more hesitancy. “How can I help you? Because the answer is still no to keeping Joker as a ferret.. Only if he breaks out of Arkham.”

“Well..funny story…”

\--  
“I guess if people can fly why the fuck wouldn’t there be magic too, eh?” Renee said as Zatanna reversed the spell on Huntress. 

“It would have worn off in a week,” Zatanna said, passing Helena a new vial of clear liquid to drink. 

Helena scowled and tipped the vial back into her throat. 

“When will it work?”

“Should work right away,” Zatanna squinted at her, “you’ll feel dizzy for a split second.” 

“Look at Dinah’s boobs,” Harley suggested from where she was touching some weird looking crystals. 

“No!” Helena flushed, averting her eyes from Dinah and towards the window. 

“It worked,” Dinah, Harley, and Renee all said in unison. 

Helena huffed, crossing her arms before looking back at Zatanna, “thanks I guess.” 

Amused, Zatanna just smiled. “Welcome.” 

\--

“Well this has been one fucked up day for the birds of prey,” Renee said as they left the magic shop. “You still need to disinfect my filing cabinet and wherever else you guys fucked though.” 

Helena opened her mouth, wanting to say something but not knowing what to say. 

“Listen, Helena and I need to talk,” Dinah interjected, “and then yes. I will personally disinfect. Okay? Great.”

“You ladies have fun now,” Harley gave a suggestive wink and cackle before walking off with Renee who even snorted under her breath. 

Helena groaned. This was mortifying. On so many levels. 

“Hey,” Dinah was holding her hand all of a sudden, a shy smile on her face. “They left us so… how about we go grab some dinner and talk?”

“O-okay. Sure.” 

Dinah smiled widely before walking back to her car. 

Once they sat inside, Dinah turned to her and sighed, “you’ve basically only had sex with prostitutes, huh? Is that why you didn’t cuddle because that hurt my feelings.” 

“Oh… I'm sorry about that.”

“Okay. And if you fucking passed some STD to me I swear to God I am going to kick your ass.” 

“No STDs! That was only once. In Sicily. My eighteenth birthday. That was before I understood prositution is you know… bad.” 

“Okay.”

“Her name was--”

“I really don’t need to know.” 

“Right. Okay.” 

“So,” Dinah chuckled, “we slept together… We just fought about being in love. I say this relationship is off to a good start.” 

“Dinah,” Helena raised her chin with bravado, “I admire you. Not just your body but you. I love you. I have never felt this before… I’m afraid of these feelings but I want you. I’m sorry I drank someone else’s Coke by accident that tasted funny, not because it wasn’t Diet but because it had some magic sex potion. I’m sorry our first time was like that. And our second. Also, I’m sorry I touched your ass on the sidewalk.”

“--I kind of liked that part,” Dinah murmured. 

“Yeah I…” Helena blushed, “well Zatanna said the potion only gave insight to how my partner wanted to have sex if it was mutual… and my the confidence to act and perform it. It had to be consensual acts only…”

\--

Dinner was forgotten with Dinah’s car parked in the closest alley. The top was up, covering them from the light rain droplets and eyes of people. The windows were fogging up as the car rocked in a way that even the homeless drunk who was always seeing things sway in his vision could not confuse for anything other than sexual congress. 

Helena had the seat reclined and Dinah was bouncing on her lap with the rigorous enthusiasm of a gymnast and their trampoline. 

“Oh yeah,” Dinah gasped into Helena’s ear, a wanton moan of approval leaving her lips as a thumb circled he rclit. 

“I’m fucking you…” Helena seemed to realize out loud in an exhale of heavy breathing, “in your tight pants…”

“Yeah fuck me,” Dinah gripped her hair by the roots before pulling her into a kiss, lips hungry in their purpose before she had to break away and say, “I’m gonna cum.”

Helena groaned, her other hand moved up from Dinah’s hip where it had been guiding her up-and-down rhythm to slide into her blonde-dyed hair and press their foreheads together.

“Oh!” Dinah cried, her body tensing, her eyes rolling back, and her nails digging into Helena’s hair as she came. After a moment, her body went limp and she reached down to hold Helena’s wrist where it was before grinding a slower pace as she was still coming down and wanted to ride every single wave. 

Helena was mesmerized. She bit her lip and leaned forward to kiss Dinah again. She felt so many things. Lust, need… possessive… affectionate. 

“Mmm,” Dinah broke off their kiss to reward Helena with a smile that was so satisfied as she lifted her hips and Hellena’s slick fingers met cool air. 

“Fuck,” Helena closed her eyes. There had never been a sexier thing in her life. She could die happy right now. 

“You know,” Dinah re-buttoned her very tight pants and moved back into the driver’s seat. “You really don’t need sexual confidence. That was hot…my panties are ruined.”

Helena swallowed and said, once again, “I am so in love with you.”

Dinah’s smile shifted from alluring to content and she leaned over to peck Helena’s lips. “Me too. Where have you been my whole life, Crossbow?”

Helena raised her wet finger to her mouth and sucked them clean, eyes on Dinah. She smiled when Dinah whimpered. “Waiting for you, I guess.” 

“Change of plans. We are ordering pizza and locking ourselves in a bedroom. And this time I get to have my turn with your body..”


End file.
